A Man with a Plan

Theo has a fun new way of expressing himself when he's mad: He tells you exactly what he's going to do, in great detail, using the phrasing "I'm just going to..." at the beginning of every sentence or phrase. You're wondering how this is amusing? Picture this: Last night we tried to go to a book sale at our library, only to find out that Friday night was members-only night...and we're not members. Theo, who hadn't wanted to go in the first place, suddenly really wanted to go and was furious when we said we had to just walk home instead of going in. So imagine an incredibly indignant, blonde-haired, blue-eyed cherub announcing with all the fury he can muster:  "No! I am just going to get the key to the front door [which hangs way up high so he can't reach it], and I am going to open the front door, and I am going to walk down the driveway, and I am going to look both ways, and I am going to walk into the street, and I am going to stay in the gray part [the gutter on the side of the street--we have no sidewalk], and I am going to walk down the path, and I am going to walk to the library, and I am going to take my ID, and I am going to get a library card [apparently he remembers from several months ago that I couldn't get a library card because I didn't have an ID with the right address on it], and I am going to go to the book sale!" And then he looked at us in all his four-year-old rage, as if defying us to argue with his well-thought-out plan. And yes, the italics are his emphasis. It's rather hilarious. I love that he even threw in the safety points of looking both ways before going into the street and walking in "the gray part." You can't say that boy isn't a thinker....

Poop Savant

These days, I seem to be posting a lot of poop stories! But this is because Theo is very, very interested in poop, so he talks about it a lot. Today we were in the car, and apropos of nothing, I hear:

Theo: I want to touch bat poop.
Me: You want to touch bat poop?
Theo (very seriously): Yes.
Me: Okay... Why do you want to touch bat poop?
Theo: So I can pick it up.

Um, okay... The funniest part was that he then continued to mutter to himself in the back seat: "There are lots of kinds of poop. Dog poop, cat poop, people poop, bat poop, rabbit poop...." And he was so darn serious about it! It reminded me of that guy in Forrest Gump who talks about all of the zillion different ways his family prepares shrimp. Or perhaps the Rain Man... That's my son--a poop savant!

More Bathroom Chat

While getting ready for bed tonight, Theo had to go to the bathroom--both ways. It smelled pretty rank, but I wasn't going to make him self-conscious by saying anything about it. He took care of that for me, though, by saying, "Hey Mama, could you fix the bathroom so it doesn't smell like poop?"

Gladly, my son...gladly. Hand me the Glade....

Call Him will.i.am...

Theo's latest obsession is the Black Eyed Peas--the group fronted by will.i.am and Fergie. In particular, he loves a video put together by the Today Show where all the editors, producers, and talent for the show dance to the Black Eyed Peas' "I Gotta Feeling." In fact, he's certain that they do this daily at the Today Show, and for that reason he now wants to go to New York and see the Today Show.

Now, most of the time Theo plays by himself. He's not really into cooperative play, unless it's chase. But today, he actually put together an imaginative scene and invited me to play with him:

Theo: Hey, Mama, do you want to sing, and I will play my instruments, and we will be on the Today Show?
Me (startled and delighted by this cooperative imaginative play): Sure! What should we sing?
Theo: The Black Eyed Peas!

And he began to sing "I Gotta Feeling" while jumping on his trampoline and playing the saxophone. (Because, of course, we must be doing at least three things at once--doing one thing simply will not suffice in Theo's world!) I sang along, and we had a grand old time. And all the while I was thinking, "Well, cooperative imaginative play for a lot of kids is probably more along the lines of 'let's play prince and princess' or 'let's pretend we're superheroes' or 'let's be firemen'...but my kid wants to play will.i.am...." Fine with me! I guess that makes me Fergie....

TMI

Theo likes to give a running commentary about what he's recently done in the bathroom. Usually it involves what shape of poop he made, but today's was interesting and unique. Theo emerged from the bathroom, pulling up his pants:

Me: Oh, you went potty? Pee or poop?
Theo: Just pee. It had bubbles in it.

He must've examined it closely, I guess. I've never noticed bubbly pee, but it sounds like fun!

In Praise of Bees

I think I fall into the trap of saying, "Good job!" to Theo pretty often. Why is this a trap? Well, "they" say you're supposed to use specific praise with a child, instead of just saying, "Good job!" And I do give specific praise, but I think I also often say "Good job!" This was evident today at the nursery, where we went to buy planter boxes and veggies to try to create a garden in our cement-covered backyard. There was  a huge bumble bee buzzing around one of the vines, and Theo was getting panicky. In an effort to calm him, I said, "Just ignore him, and he'll ignore you. He's just busy doing his job gathering some pollen to make honey." Theo calmed down, looked at the bee, and proclaimed, "Good job, bee!"

Diaper Fetish

I think my son may have the beginnings of a panty fetish. He'sobsessed with knowing what diapers everyone is wearing. (Not surprisingly, this began when we brought home his new baby brother.) The other day at the park, he met and played with another little boy, and he promptly asked the boy's mother, "Hey lady--what diaper is he wearing?" And for his birthday, my sister gave him a Cabbage Patch doll "born" the same day as his baby brother. Upon seeing the doll, Theo exclaimed, "Hey, does he have a diaper on? Hey, can you help me take his pants off to check?"

Um, yeah...it's a diaper fetish. ;-)

Cake-aholic

Theo takes after his mama in his love of tasty treats. I baked him a guitar cake for his birthday, and he was very excited about it, even trying to "play" the strings. I asked him where he'd like me to cut his piece from--the body, the neck, the frets, etc. His reply? "All of it. I would like a lot."

Yup, he's my son. I always want a lot of cake, too. :-)